Dear actors: Learn your lines
The foundation of fun is competence and I will die on this boring hill
A thing that’s working for me: Learning my lines
Okay, this is a cheat: this is a thing that’s working for me when I’m performing comedy, not writing it – but sue me, I do both, and it’s my Substack and I can do what I want with it!
*stamps foot*
Being funny isn’t the first thing I need to do as a comedy performer. Sure, it’s the most important thing, and if I don’t do it pretty quickly then there’s a problem. But it’s usually the second thing I do.
The first thing is to signal to the audience that I’ve got this. Audiences – with the notable exception of gong show audiences – are generally nice people. They don’t want to see a performer fail; the second-hand embarrassment of someone bombing is toe-curlingly awful. Audiences want to enjoy themselves; which means they’re looking for any sign of reassurance that I know what I’m doing.
And the quickest way I tell the audience hey, relax now, everything’s going to be fine, it’s okay to laugh at this is to be competent. Stand where I’m meant to stand. Speak at a volume where everyone can hear me. Look like I’m enjoying myself. Perhaps actually enjoy myself.
And if I’m doing a one-hour sketch performance at Hen and Chickens on March 21st, for example, that means memorising my lines.
I am a much more confident performer when I know my lines. My ad libs are so much better when they come from a place of play and not of panic. When I know my lines, I can fuck about with my physicality, my character, my relationship to the other characters on stage. And all that fucking-about-ery is possible because I’m not standing there thinking oh god oh god what’s my next line I have no idea oh god oh god – all of which is probably totally obvious to the audience in my rictus grin and motionless stance.
A thing I’m working on: Rewriting my documentary-style sitcom as an exercise
I’ve just had my first professional piece of feedback on my 15-minute sitcom Absolute Witches, and they aren’t convinced by the documentary-style format. Their point is that it’s been done a lot: Modern Family, What We Do in the Shadows, Parks and Rec, The Office etc.
I have to admit, I really love writing comedy using a documentary-style format. It allows for a lot of quick exposition and a lot of jokes from the juxtaposition of what a character says and what we see them do.
So I’m going to attempt to rewrite my script without using the documentary-style format – moving from Parks and Rec to Brooklyn Nine-Nine. And to pretend to myself that I’m not rewriting it and not binning all my jokes which rely on that format, I will treat this as an exercise I’m doing. An experiment. I’m doing this for science!
A thing I’m enjoying: Gianmarco Soresi’s crowd work
After previously complaining that the commodification of art has led to stand-up comedians cultivating crowd work content to further their brand, I will now immediately undermine that point by admitting that I love Gianmarco Soresi’s crowd work.
What can I say? The man is very good at crowd work! I like how he takes the whole audience with him for his shows – he’s not performing comedy at them, he’s discovering comedy with them (or at least pretending to). And the crowd work doesn’t feel mean or like he’s annoyed to have his set derailed – he seems genuinely interested by each audience member’s story and to pull out everything funny he can.
So I guess my incredibly nuanced and powerful point is that I enjoy crowd work when it’s good and I don’t enjoy it when it’s bad. More piping hot takes coming soon.
Did I do the thing from last time to build connections? Yes
I did indeed email another agent – researched the agency, wrote the email, edited the email, sent the email - all in one task. I surely deserve some kind of medal by now.
A thing I’m doing to build connections: Messy feedback group
I’ve signed up for the writers’ bootcamp organised by the Messy Collective. I’ve selected the feedback option, so for the next eight weeks I will be writing the first draft of a play along with two other people also writing their first plays. We’re also meeting in person to go see America The Beautiful tonight.